


Angels Surrounding

by writetherest



Category: Angels in America - Kushner
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-12
Updated: 2013-08-12
Packaged: 2017-12-23 06:42:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/923191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writetherest/pseuds/writetherest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>The years pass in a blur of trips. Trips to the fountain, to the hospital, to the store, to the diner down the street. Prior deteriorates before her eyes, and she prays fervently every night for him.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Angels Surrounding

**Author's Note:**

> My take on Hannah's relationship with Prior during and after the miniseries.

Hannah does come back to the hospital. It is much later, visiting hours are nearly over, and Prior is lying on the bed, his eyes closed. She stops in the doorway, considering turning around and not disturbing him when his voice stops her.

"You came back."

She comes slightly further into the room. "Yes, well."

He smiles, or tries to anyway. "You can come in, you know. No more angels around to frighten you."

"It was just a –"

"It wasn't a dream." He says firmly. His voice is still hoarse. "You, of all people, should know it wasn't a dream."

She clears her throat and allows herself to sit on the edge of his bed. Her hand instantly goes to his forehead to check for fever. His eyes go closed at her touch, as though it soothes him. "Your fever hasn't come back. That's good."

"So they say."

Silence stretches between them. It is slightly awkward, but not quite uncomfortable.

Finally she asks the question she's been wanting to ask. "Those men…"

He knows what she is asking. "Belize and Louis. Both former lovers. Now friends, at least in Belize's case."

"And Louis is…" She cannot bring herself to say it.

"Louis is the man your son was fucking."

She narrows her eyes at him, and her voice is strict. "You watch yourself, young man."

That does bring a smile. "They aren't anymore, if it makes you feel better. At least, as far as I know."

Joe had told her the same thing when she found him on the street, when they'd sung with the Mormon choir. She nods and wonders what exactly it is that she is doing here. She should be home making dinner. Dinner for her homosexual son.

Emily enters the room with a smile. "Hello gorgeous," she greets Prior. She checks his vitals and turns to Hannah. "I'm sorry, but visiting hours are over. Unless you're family, in which case…"

"I'm not." She is quick to say.

Prior lets out a wry chuckle as Emily nods. "No more than ten minutes." She warns as she exits again.

Hannah stands, moves to leave the room. Doesn't know what to say.

"They brought me AZT. I don't know if I should take it." Prior blurts. She turns to look at him. She doesn't know much about AIDS, but she has heard a few things, on the news. She doesn't ask who 'they' are, or how 'they' got it.

"It'll help you?"

"So they say."

"Then you should take it." It is not a difficult decision.

"Yes, but it could wreck my immune system or do any number of other things and…"

"It's your decision." She says firmly. "But if it'll help you, you should take it." She leaves without another word.

**

They release him from the hospital a week later. She is the one he calls, not Belize or Louis. For reasons she cannot explain, she goes and picks him up.

She has had time, lots of time, in the week he has been in the hospital to look into this AZT medication. The visitors' center has been exceptionally slow, so she has taken to slipping off to the library and reading what she can find about it, which is, admittedly not that much. She understands even less of it.

She still doesn't know why exactly she cares, but at night she dreams of the Angel and of Prior. She thinks it may be a sign from God, a purpose for her trip. Maybe it was never about Joe and Harper, maybe it was always about Prior.

"I've been reading about that AZT." She tells him. "There are side effects that aren't so nice, but it seems to be helping people with…" She can't bring herself to say the word for some reason.

"AIDS. People with AIDS. People like me."

"Yes. People like you. People with... that. It is helping them. It would help you too. Your doctors have said as much. Your nurse friend has said as much."

"You spoke to my doctors?" She does not respond. "You're not my mother, Hannah. You don't have to."

It's the first time he's called her by her name. "I know that." She responds.

Still, when they get back to the apartment, she makes him chicken noodle soup and tucks him into bed, as though that will make it all better.

"Take the AZT." She tells him before she leaves.

**

She takes him to the fountain for the first time in early spring, when he gets out of the hospital for the third time since she's met him. Each time she had come to visit him at least once. And each time she had been the one to take him home when he was released. She does not question why this is, or why she continues to visit and help him. She also does not question why Emily no longer questions her presence, or why she is now allowed to stay past visiting hours if she wishes.

She thinks he will like it there, in the park, with the angel made of stone. She is right.

They sit on the benches above the monument and she tells him the story of the Angel Bethesda. He closes his eyes as she speaks, taking everything in, absorbing it all. When she is done, he asks for her to tell the story again, just so he can be sure he knows it. She obliges, telling him about the Millennium and the fountain flowing again.

"I'll take you there." She tells him, surprising herself as much as him. "And we'll both wash ourselves clean."

He smiles at that. He likes that idea. He takes her hand and squeezes it, and she does not pull away. Instead, she squeezes back.

**

Joe announces that he is taking a job in Washington not long after Hannah takes Prior to the fountain for the first time. There is nothing, he tells her, that is keeping him here now that Harper is gone. She wants to ask "what about me?", but does not. She merely nods at him.

She has already made too many mistakes with him. She hasn't been a good enough mother to him, she knows that. She will not burden him with herself. She asks when he is leaving, and smiles when he tells her in two weeks.

**

"Joe is moving to Washington," she tells him calmly, as she stands in front of his stove, cooking something. It is a new thing that has started happening recently. She comes over in the evenings, puts her hand on his head to check for fever, asks if he is taking the AZT, examines the lesions, and then begins to cook.

He likes her cooking, so he does not complain. Once the food is ready, they sit and eat together, talking about anything and everything. He tells her about his ascent to Heaven, she tells him the story of Bethesda once again, they discuss religion and politics. It is easier to talk to him, to tell him her point of view, than anyone else she's ever met, even when he doesn't agree with her.

"What?" He doesn't know why she is telling him this.

"He got a job there. So he's moving. Of course he won't need the apartment anymore. But I think it's a good thing. I mean, I was never supposed to stay here. I can go back to Salt Lake and…" She trails off. There is really nothing to do in Salt Lake. Certainly no homosexual, dying man to take care of.

Prior says nothing for a long time, just watches her as she stirs the gravy and checks the roast (that he won't be able to keep down, but that he'll eat, because she says he needs the protein).

"Well, maybe you don't have to. I mean, Louis isn't here anymore and – it's not a huge place, but it's big enough and –" He says nothing more. He doesn't say that he's come to depend on her, to need her, and that he isn't ready for yet another person to leave him.

She just continues to stir the gravy as though he never spoke. She doesn't say that she'll miss him, that she'll worry about him if she isn't there (more than she does now), that she's not quite ready to leave him behind like Joe and everyone else has left her.

He throws up all the pot roast that night. But the next evening, when she tells him that she's decided to stay in the city, in Joe's apartment, at least until his lease is up, he thinks it was worth it.

**

After his release from the fourth hospital visit, which was not in any way pleasant, Prior needs cheering up. His eyes are starting to go, and he's getting weaker. Belize is the one who comes up with the idea of shopping, but Prior is the one who decides that they should go shopping for her.

She has never enjoyed shopping, never truly shopped for pleasure, and certainly never been shopping for clothes with two gay men before, but she remembers Prior's sweaty, at times small and lifeless body in the hospital bed and relents.

She turns many, many of their choices down, but does end up with a much more 'New York' look by the end of the trip. Most of the clothes are solid, basic black, but Prior says it's okay. Belize begins talking about cutting and coloring her hair, and when Prior actually laughs, she thinks it was worth it.

**

She finds that she enjoys Belize's company very much, once she gets past the uncomfortableness, and soon grows to care for him. Not as much as she has come to care for Prior, but still far more than the old Hannah ever would have.

Louis is a different, more complicated story, and although things are not as awkward any more, they are far from as easy as things with Prior or Belize. Still, Prior wants Louis in his life in some way, so she deals with him.

She doesn't hear much from Joe and soon is spending all her time, including major holidays, with Prior, instead of Joe. She feels almost as though she has traded one son for another. And although she will always love Joe, Prior has worked his way firmly into her heart.

**

The years pass in a blur of trips. Trips to the fountain, to the hospital, to the store, to the diner down the street. Prior deteriorates before her eyes, and she prays fervently every night for him. "Bless him with more life. More life."

Louis is now a fixture in her life, just as Prior and Belize are. Joe had balked when he'd heard her speak of him, but he hasn't been back in over five years. She misses him, a part of her heart is no longer whole without him. But she is not sad, not like she was when he'd left her the first time.

She has a new family now, a family she has built, that God has given to her. They fight like all families do, annoy each other, but ultimately love each other. It is more than she had before, and so she fervently thanks God each night as well.

**

When it finally happens, it is just the two of them. A full circle.

It gets too bad, too bad for the hospital, and she takes him home, to his home, as he asks her to. He wants to see the fountain one more time with his trees in bloom. He begs her. But it is still too cold, and he is too weak. He cannot even walk, and she can no longer support him as she had in the past.

She does what she can, filling the room with pictures of the fountain. They are everywhere, in every frame, on every surface available. The Angel surrounding him. That seems to do the trick, at least a little bit.

It is at the point where it is too bad, too hard for Louis, and Belize is working long hours, so he isn't there either. Prior curses them for it, for not being there, but she knows he also understands. He tells her to leave, to get out while she can, but she stays resolute. She will not leave him.

She holds him when the shakes become violent, wipes him down with cool cloths when the fever is too high, and prays over him constantly. She speaks soothing words, and over and over she tells him about Bethesda.

And then, suddenly The Angel is there, with them. "Greetings Prophet." Her voice is soft now, not like it had been before. And she is not nearly as fierce looking as she had been then, so many years ago. She is softer, smoother now somehow.

He closes his eyes with a groan. "Not you again."

"It is Time."

His hands try to grasp hers, but they barely put any pressure on her at all. She holds him tightly for the both of them. "No. More time. More life." His words are hardly more than croaks.

"I'm sorry, Prophet." The Angel comes closer.

He stares at The Angel, defiant. "Bless me."

The Angel leans forward and presses her lips to his forehead. Then she repeats the gesture with Hannah. When she is finished, she holds out her hand. "Come, Prophet."

He wants to fight, but she squeezes him tightly. She cannot speak, so she nods and releases him, giving him permission, telling him to let go.

He reaches out a hand, and The Angel takes it. He turns back to her. "I'll see you soon."

She nods. She believes that she will see him soon.

"I love you." It is the first time either has said those particular words, although they've both always known how they feel.

"I love you too."

And then he is gone.

She calls Louis and Belize and then the funeral home. When they ask her relation to the deceased, she says simply, "I am his mother."

**

After Prior's death, she spends even more time at the fountain than before, going nearly every day. She feels him there, feels his presence, and it soothes her aching heart.

Joe tries to get her to come to Washington, to live with him. "Mother, there's nothing keeping you there now. He's gone –"

"Prior." She speaks his name softly, but strongly. Joe has never referred to him by name. "Prior is gone. But Belize and Louis are still here."

She practically feels him flinch through the phone. "Mother."

"And the center. I have a life here, Joe. I'm staying."

It's different with Belize and Louis now. Without Prior it is more strained, more melancholy. But they still visit, still eat meals together on occasion. She misses them, who they were when Prior was alive.

**

She cleans out his apartment, giving Louis and Belize what they want of it, before donating the rest. The only things she keeps are the pictures of the fountain and a few pictures of them together throughout the years. She places them all around her apartment. The Angel surrounding her. The Angel and Prior.

**

It is almost a year to the day when it is her turn. She knows it is coming, even though she seems to be in perfect health. She is in her bed, has just finished her prayers, when The Angel arrives.

For the first time, she is not afraid, not even a little. She smiles. "Hello, Angel."

"Hello, Hannah. It is Time."

"Prior?"

"Is waiting for you." Her hand stretches out. Hannah takes it with no hesitation. She is ready to go, to be forever surrounded by Prior and the angels.

**

Prior is waiting for her, wearing a vivid red robe. He greets her with a kiss, and then smiles. He leads her through the dull, broken city, until they reach a small fountain, flowing with water.

She looks to him and he nods. "I've been waiting for you."

Together they bathe in the fountain, finally, finally washed clean.  



End file.
